I have Mercedes teeth. No, I'm not making it up! My dentist said I have Mercedes teeth. I've never had my teeth compared to a car before. I'm going to take it as a compliment. However, my Mercedes needs an oil change. Again, not making this up! This is how I found out I needed the oil change:
"I am going to take this sharp pointy thing and jam it up into your gums and see if you bleed. If you bleed that means you don't have healthy gums. This might be a tad uncomfortable," so says my dentist.
Well, okay, maybe I'm making up the "jamming a sharp pointy thing into your gums" statement up, but the rest is true. And that is exactly what he did! And it hurt! And I bled! A lot! But wouldn't you if someone was jamming sharp pointy objects into your highly vascular gum bed? It tasted like I'd been socked in the mouth a few times after he was done. But apparently I have gingivitis because my gums bled. Which means my gums need to be planed. Like a sandblaster on a plank of wood. What is it with these metaphors? But since I have Mercedes teeth it was not a depressing day. And that was all I was aiming for.